When Beginnings End

I never knew love could hurt so much.

I’m coming to the end of a 19 year marriage. It’s amicable. It’s a peaceful finale. I’m constantly aware of the reasons, the logic, the adjustments … they’re all easy to see, they’re ever-present.

As it turns out, the end isn’t the hardest part for me.

For me, the hardest part of the end is remembering the beginning.

The beginning is an innocent. It knows only of hope and endless possibilities.

It’s a beacon of light, reminding hearts of their way home to one another. 

It’s a soft place to land.

In the beginning — there was no end.

And however real, the end I’m now standing in may be, it doesn’t make it any easier when I remember what the beginning felt like.

But I do recognise that I’m not the only person to have ever gone through this experience. Obviously!

And I can see that so many people go through this situation and have so many different experiences, all the time.

So I want to put forth the notion that in this emotionally confusing time when we are separating from loved ones, we might also be able to take action, no matter the size, and help remind other people going through this, that whilst they are separating from a loved one, they’re not separated from everyone.

So this is my action. A small blog post, telling a bit of my story, for my own therapeutic benefit, as well as to possibly help someone who may stumble across it and feel a little more connected, during their time of separating.

And especially express that I don’t believe there is any “normal” way to experience this. However you’re feeling, is your way, and that’s okay. We all have our own ways and they’re all okay.

We’re all okay. No matter how fragile we feel and for how long we feel that way.

Separated but together … we’re all okay.

Be good to you.

Love,

Currently All Round Messy and Emotionally Confused but Getting There,

Zoe xxx

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